Hello. My name is Christopher Michael Jones and this is my blog. This is my first real blog and this is my first post on it. 26 words in and I'd say it's going pretty well but I shan't get complacent; the mighty can fall at any time.
Right, well I'd like to take this opportunity (and I will), to introduce myself to you all.
So here I am...
Yup, that's me.
I'd really like to clear this up once and for all, because I know you're all thinking it (and you know I know you're all thinking it, etc.), it really is the proverbial elephant in the room. So let's get it over with; IT ISN'T SEMEN! IT ISN'T FUCKING SEMEN!!
Oh, there I am again:
Aww, don't I look happy? - (I'm not).
So that's me...and this is a big moth:
So now you've seen me and you'll probably be wanting to know more. You'll probably be wanting to know all sorts of interesting things about the type of person I am and the various things about the world that make me think and feel deeply. Most of all, you'll probably want to know if I can make a picture of a witch out of salt. Well, I can. (See bottom for picture).
I came into this bewildering world on 25th December 1989 and now 21 years later I'm sat writing this blog. A bunch of stuff happened to me in the middle of that (including some awesome shit with my ass and a garden hose), but I guess that's all a little arbitrary. I could spend time telling you about all of that stuff and that it shaped who I am today, however I think we all know that that is somewhat obvious when a person has got to grips with the relatively simple idea of the linear passage of time and it's environmental factors, as is illustrated in this graph. (See fig. 1).
So that's the past taken care of. WHERE AM I NOW? Well, I'm a cynical human being who has a rather starry-eyed perspective of the world. I bet you've never heard of that before? - I bet you've never cared either? Seriously though, I really am at a loss for words when I periodically peer around at this place and see the absolute apathy and ignorance we all tend to have (including me) about the state this shit is in. Do we give a fuck? Do we want to? The governments of the west are literally tearing the third world apart and destroying what's left of the humanity in our very souls. By systematically crushing every form of progressive, democratic government in developing nations and forcing unwanted globalization onto countries without the capacity to feed themselves, let alone us. We're literally raping the world. This isn't a joke. This isn't a fucking conspiracy theory. Everyday our governments are supporting opportunistic and murderous tyrants whilst torturing and killing those with a view to helping their people out of dire poverty, all in the name of supporting "democracy". There are wars going on that you don't even know about. There are people suffering that you've never even thought about. There is agony going on that you couldn't possibly imagine. It's fucked beyond belief.
BUT IS THERE HOPE?
There is always hope! (Unless you're hoping for this rant to end soon). There is hope because this world can be truly beautiful when it really wants to be. I know for a fact that there is genuine compassion and genuine love within everyone of us. I know that it can't always be like this because the sheer, unyielding power of expression and feeling that exists deep within all of our hearts is magnificent and raging. Can't you see how fucking beautiful we all are? How fucking astonishing this infinite consciousness is? Haven't we all, atleast once in our lives been brought to tears by seeing the capacity of our collective tenderness? We are love. We are the creators. WE ARE GODS! Except for David Blaine. He's not a god. he's just a douche.
So there's the starry-eyed cynic in me.
That's the past and the present. WHAT ABOUT THE FUTURE?
Well I'm going to post this blog and then I'm probably going to play some Tetris. Why? Because I like Tetris and I'm getting pretty fucking good, alright?!
Here's me playing Tetris:
Here's me playing Tetris in a different hat:
Here's me playing Tetris on the toilet:
Well, I guess that just about wraps it up. As first posts go, it probably could have been better, but then again, it probably could have been alot worse. I'm really going to try my hardest to keep this up and post regularly. I'm also going to try to be as honest and straight forward as I can be. Don't worry, there's lot's to look forward to. I'm seething with ideas right now. How about a bunch of number 8s? 888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 Fuck Yeah! When was the last time you saw that many 8s in a row on a website. And that's just the beginning. There's plenty more where that came from. who knows what could happen next. It's going off!!
So I guess this is goodbye for now. Have a great day everyone.
Peace. x.
(Oh, and here's the Salt Witch).
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